Monthly Archives: April 2008

How to Get and Stay Depressed

(See Comic) In this guide you will learn how to get and stay depressed. If you want to be happy though, then I suggest you do the opposite of what this guide suggests. Most depressed people are depressed simply because they spend an insane amount of time entertaining depressing thoughts. And they in turn make themselves vulnerable to depressing thoughts through their actions and philosophies. What constitutes depressing thoughts varies from person to person, but in general, depressing thoughts involve guilt, loss, separation, futility, and a general belief in death. Belief in death is in fact the main prerequisite for depression. Death says, I am little, temporary, and vulnerable…I must kill or be killed. And this makes life very urgent and desperate or pointless and futile. It makes loss real and so makes a deep, persistent, and depressing sense of guilt inevitable. Here rests a body that really lived and really died *Hang out with depressing people. My life sucks and it always will, so let’s roll a blunt. *Maintain a false sense of self through identification with things. Look at my sweet ride. And listen to this sound system. Now I can annoyingly announce to everybody within a one mile radius that I have inadequacy issues. Boom Boom depression medication * Listen to as much depressing music as possible. Oh Oh my baby’s dead… *Think often about the past and regret it. If it wasn’t for that horse, I could have graduated college. *Always get really excited over nothing. I won a free ticket! Play Shirley Jackson’s Scratch Off Lottery *Always get really upset over nothing. My free ticket wasn’t a winner. *Always choose morbidity over humor. Miami Murder Law up next *Be very uptight and take everything personally and seriously. This cartoon is horrible. It should be taken off the air. *Be consistently thoughtless and selfish, or impatient and judgmental. Either attitude is bound to cause you problems. Bla Bla Bla Me Me Me Honk Honk Get the hell off the phone and drive you dumb bitch. treatments for depression *Get very attached and addicted to things. My boyfriend broke up with me, my dog died, my car broke down, and there is only decaf. *Enslave yourself to things; primarily by having lots of debt that only grows. Foreclosure notice credit counseling *Always compare yourself to other people. Steroids monthly Boob Job Quarterly breast augmentation Forbes 500 richest people *Always believe that it is something outside yourself and beyond the immediate moment that will bring you lasting happiness. After this, this, and that happens, then I’ll be happy. *Fill up your gas tank as often as possible.

What is Ego Anyway? Part 3 The Projected Universe

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(See Comic) When it comes to comprehending this world, the problem with most people, theists and atheists alike, is that they are too presumptively materialistic. In other words, they put undue and unquestioned emphasis on the sanctity and authenticity of the material world. They are like dreamers convinced that the dream is real. They fail to realize that if they simply looked at the world psychologically, they would start to dream lucidly and ultimately awaken.The ego is the dream maker of the universe. And so, the universe is basically a giant projection of the ego’s thought system. And the ego’s thought system is built on the idea of separation (duality) sustained by guilt. The ego and the resulting universe is like a little experiment in considering what it would be like to make something separate from God (separate from oneness). This experiment was so extreme and insane though that it got out of control quick. The universe is basically built upon the invention of the concept of I relative to an other. That other is God and God is oneness. Before the concept of I, which is the concept of two, all is one and all is God. But the concept of I makes for an isolated sense of individuality and thus separation. But it is all just an insane idea made into an extended insane dream called the universe. But don’t worry, an insane dream doesn’t change reality (God). The idea of I, which is the birth of ego, is an insane idea relative to the oneness of God. With I comes opposites. Where there was only peace, life, and eternity, there is now also conflict, death, and time. These are terrifying concepts. And with these new terrifying concepts comes the opposite of innocence, guilt. And it is the guilt that comes out of these new terrifying ideas that ultimately leads to the dreaming of the universe. This guilt comes from the belief that the idea of I (two) is real. The idea of I (splitting from God) is like the ultimate crime and with the ultimate crime comes ultimate punishment. To escape this guilt and punishment the idea of I is repeated ad infinitum. In other words, this guilt is projected outward to make many I’s. And that projection is what we call the universe. When thought about psychologically, the universe is like a giant guilt recycling and storage center; it is a defense mechanism for coping with an overwhelming sense of guilt, without really getting rid of it. Each individual ego comes from the one ego, which was the first idea of I. If there was only one I then there would be no place to project guilt, and thus sustain it. Guilt is what keeps the sense of I and thus ego alive. With only one I, all it would take to get rid of guilt is to forget the crazy concept of I and wake up. Without opposites, there is no guilt, only innocence. But with I comes guilt, because I is the birth of opposites. The universe is a place of opposites. The good is symbolic of reality, which is oneness with God, and the bad is symbolic of the nightmare of separating from God. We like to project the bad stuff (guilt) onto others through judgment and blame, while we like to identify ourselves with the good stuff (innocence). And that is how the dream of the universe is maintained: strengthening difference and thus the sense of I. Therefore, the way out of the dream is to ultimately undo your individual ego. Waking up from Ego dreams.